Over the past several weeks I have been reading the book, Adoption for Dummies which has become a great resource. I have been borrowing the copy from the library but I think I will actually just purchase my own copy!
Anyway, in reading through the book, I have come to realize all of the things we get to look forward doing over the next few months. Here are just a few of the fun things we get to do:
1. Filling out TONS of paperwork! First our application, then a more detailed list of personality questions. From what I have been reading if we were doing an international adoption this would about triple in the amount of paperwork.
2. Creating our family profile. This sounds like it should be fun as it is basically our life stories up to this point and we get to include pictures. Hopefully our birthmother won't think we are a couple of goobers! We have tons of camping/hiking pictures so hopefully they don't mind natural settings...
3. Getting the "prostate exam" equivalent masked as a home-study. We will be scrutinized and evaluated pretty thoroughly. This is to make sure that we can provide a safe, loving environment for the baby and to make sure that we are a stable family unit. We will have to be clear that the crates are for the dogs and not our version of a "play yard". :) Thank goodness too we now have a functional kitchen with a sink and everything. We probably would not have passed this time last year if we had tried!
4. Parenting training classes. This will actually be great for both of us. I think it will be good for us to figure out our parenting style before we have a kid but also classes like first aid, etc will be good for both of us. Scott is so afraid of breaking a baby I want to make sure he is comfortable too as I will not be the only one holding our baby until the age of 12months!
5. Decorating the baby's room. I have already started looking at the furniture and bedding options and trying to envision the room I want to create for our little one. We have tossed the idea around of a Purdue Boilermaker room as it faces our neighbor's IU nursery...always a rivarly!
6. Waiting, waiting, and more waiting. This will probably be the hardest part. Once we have filled out all of the paperwork, created our profile, and become active we have to wait to be picked by our birthmother. I have already been thinking and praying about the woman who will be making that amazing choice to allow us to parent her child. What a gift she will be giving us and she doesn't even know it yet. Be patient with me during that time, waiting is the hardest part!
I do find it pretty amazing, the process of adoption. One line it the book basically said that all of the paperwork and the hoops you have to go through is kind of like our labor for our child. It is painful, stretches you physically and emotionally and ultimately brings you the greatest gift possible.
So as of June 13th, we start our laboring process, wish us luck!
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Busy weekend!
After a long week at work Scott and I proceeded to have a jam packed weekend! Our nephew William came down for the weekend to join Scott in the Tour De Trails bike ride Saturday.
While they were off riding, I was at our church's community garden for the blessing of the seeds. This has become an annual tradition where one of the ministers says a prayer for the garden and those who tend it each summer. It's generally a small gathering where everyone gets to know each other and of course like any good church gathering, there is coffee and refreshments!
Saturday afternoon all three of us got cleaned up for the wedding of my friend, Tim. The wedding was in Indy and we enjoyed the ceremony and the reception. Tim and I met at Common Ground Christian Church in Indy almost 10 years ago. We both ended up in the same house church. Several other people came to his wedding that had also been in our house church group so it was a great way to catch up.
Sunday I sat down for a minute before we were off to a graduation open house for Scott's cousins Ben & Anna. I was reading through our Sunday paper when I came across this article by Sharon Randall. I have attached a link to the article. It is her top 25 tips for staying married. I thought it was a good reminder of what keeps a marriage strong. Our lives can get so busy with the day to day that sometimes were take our spouses for granted. Feel free to check it out! I will be putting my "hard copy" on the fridge where I will see it each day!
http://www.redding.com/news/2012/may/21/sharon-randall-25-tips-staying-married/
While they were off riding, I was at our church's community garden for the blessing of the seeds. This has become an annual tradition where one of the ministers says a prayer for the garden and those who tend it each summer. It's generally a small gathering where everyone gets to know each other and of course like any good church gathering, there is coffee and refreshments!
Saturday afternoon all three of us got cleaned up for the wedding of my friend, Tim. The wedding was in Indy and we enjoyed the ceremony and the reception. Tim and I met at Common Ground Christian Church in Indy almost 10 years ago. We both ended up in the same house church. Several other people came to his wedding that had also been in our house church group so it was a great way to catch up.
Sunday I sat down for a minute before we were off to a graduation open house for Scott's cousins Ben & Anna. I was reading through our Sunday paper when I came across this article by Sharon Randall. I have attached a link to the article. It is her top 25 tips for staying married. I thought it was a good reminder of what keeps a marriage strong. Our lives can get so busy with the day to day that sometimes were take our spouses for granted. Feel free to check it out! I will be putting my "hard copy" on the fridge where I will see it each day!
http://www.redding.com/news/2012/may/21/sharon-randall-25-tips-staying-married/
Friday, May 11, 2012
Random thoughts...
As I was driving home early from work this afternoon I was thinking about some of the ways in which adoption and pregnancy are both similar and different.
Similarities:
--You will likely wait for your child to come for several months
--You get to have fun showers with friends and family
--There are exciting twists and turns along the way
--You are given the greatest gift possible
Differences:
--With adoption you don't end up "eating for two", making it much easier to lose the baby weight ;)
--You could have kids with all very different backgrounds
--Your child will have more than 1 mom and 1 dad to celebrate on Mother's day and Father's day
--You get to pick out out your kid with adoption...to a point!
I am sure many more random thoughts will come my way, aren't you excited??? :)
Similarities:
--You will likely wait for your child to come for several months
--You get to have fun showers with friends and family
--There are exciting twists and turns along the way
--You are given the greatest gift possible
Differences:
--With adoption you don't end up "eating for two", making it much easier to lose the baby weight ;)
--You could have kids with all very different backgrounds
--Your child will have more than 1 mom and 1 dad to celebrate on Mother's day and Father's day
--You get to pick out out your kid with adoption...to a point!
I am sure many more random thoughts will come my way, aren't you excited??? :)
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
New Beginnings!
October 13, 2012 Scott and I will be celebrating our 5th anniversary. It's hard to believe that much time has passed! Over the past 5 years we have both enjoyed fun vacations to the Smokey Mountains, South Dakota, family biking trips in Michigan and more.
Along the way we have also had some adventures in adding a baby to our family.
After having a miscarriage, we sought the advice of a fertilty doctor. After some tests it was determined that IVF would be our best bet. We thought about our options, talked with friends, did some research, and decided that adoption was a great option for our family.
At first I struggled with the thought, "Will I ever be able love an adopted child as much as I would love a biological child?" To help me figure out that answer, I felt a nudge to work in the nursery at our church during Sunday morning services. In doing that for the past 2 years, I have come to realize that I love those children so much and it became clear to me that I could love a child, regardless of whether I carried them or not.
As with a lot of women, when Scott and I talked about starting a family, I imagined myself pregnant and what that would be like. It took some time for me to be ok with not being pregnant and instead embracing our experience in a different way.
Saturday we celebrated Scott's 40th birthday and we also announced to our family and friends that we have started our adoption journey. We have taken the plunge into parenthood and we are just starting out on this journey.
If you know us you know that we enjoy hiking. We often try the challenging hikes and this seems to be no different! The reward at the end of the road will be just as wonderful as some of our most difficult hikes and I am looking forward to the hills and valleys just as much. I know that there will be difficult days ahead, but I am keeping my eye on the fact that we will have a child that has been chosen just for us.
I wasn't sure how our family and friends would react, would they be excited? Would they wonder why we had chosen this route? How would they react if we had a biracial child? Well, on Saturday we received overwhelming support in our decision and it really did feel like we were telling everyone we were pregnant! It was great to know that we have a support system and that they are excited about our little bundle of joy.
Now we must wait. Our first meeting with our agency is in June. It's funny because it almost feels like we are waiting for that first doctor's appointment to confirm our "pregnancy". It will be an exciting journey and I invite you to enjoy the adventure with us.
I am not sure what the dogs will think about the new addition, but as anything, I am sure they will adjust....as long as treats are involved!
Mount Rushmore, Summer 2011
Hiking in the Smokies, April 2011
Crazy Horse, Summer 2011
Along the way we have also had some adventures in adding a baby to our family.
After having a miscarriage, we sought the advice of a fertilty doctor. After some tests it was determined that IVF would be our best bet. We thought about our options, talked with friends, did some research, and decided that adoption was a great option for our family.
At first I struggled with the thought, "Will I ever be able love an adopted child as much as I would love a biological child?" To help me figure out that answer, I felt a nudge to work in the nursery at our church during Sunday morning services. In doing that for the past 2 years, I have come to realize that I love those children so much and it became clear to me that I could love a child, regardless of whether I carried them or not.
As with a lot of women, when Scott and I talked about starting a family, I imagined myself pregnant and what that would be like. It took some time for me to be ok with not being pregnant and instead embracing our experience in a different way.
Saturday we celebrated Scott's 40th birthday and we also announced to our family and friends that we have started our adoption journey. We have taken the plunge into parenthood and we are just starting out on this journey.
If you know us you know that we enjoy hiking. We often try the challenging hikes and this seems to be no different! The reward at the end of the road will be just as wonderful as some of our most difficult hikes and I am looking forward to the hills and valleys just as much. I know that there will be difficult days ahead, but I am keeping my eye on the fact that we will have a child that has been chosen just for us.
I wasn't sure how our family and friends would react, would they be excited? Would they wonder why we had chosen this route? How would they react if we had a biracial child? Well, on Saturday we received overwhelming support in our decision and it really did feel like we were telling everyone we were pregnant! It was great to know that we have a support system and that they are excited about our little bundle of joy.
Now we must wait. Our first meeting with our agency is in June. It's funny because it almost feels like we are waiting for that first doctor's appointment to confirm our "pregnancy". It will be an exciting journey and I invite you to enjoy the adventure with us.
I am not sure what the dogs will think about the new addition, but as anything, I am sure they will adjust....as long as treats are involved!
Molly, Chloe, and Madison, Spring 2011
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